| The Lessons of Youth (July 2005) |
By Jim Sheldon
Nine years of coaching my older son’s team went by in a blur.
We’re not talking about a high-powered youth team here. Just a bunch of 14-year-olds who, by and large, have played together since they were barely bigger than the cones. What I think I learned:
The next Landon Donovan wasn’t on my team and probably isn’t on yours. A couple may be good enough to play college soccer. The rest I simply wanted to turn into decent high school players, enjoying the sport in the process. Turning out life-long soccer fans was more important than turning out future pros.
They can’t hear you. When they’re little, save your breath. Yelling tactical instructions to a 7-year-old is almost always pointless. Getting a player to realize he/she is being substituted is strain enough on the vocal cords. Of course, once they are old enough to process instructions, you end up playing next to an interstate and no one more than 20 yards away can hear a thing anyway.
A few years ago, there was a big push for so-called Silent Saturdays, where the coach and parents have to stay silent during the game. Given the lesson I learned above, I thought this was a pretty good idea. However, there’s a loophole that needs to be closed – the silence provision should be extended to halftime. The last one of these “silent” games I coached was about four years ago. We’re playing an undefeated team and are up 1-0 at the half. I weigh in with my brilliant halftime instructions. We lose 3-1.
No kid is beyond hope. Well almost. Projecting a player’s development from age 6 to 14, much less beyond, is darn near impossible. But there are always going to be one or two who don’t have an athletic bone in their body. I never ran one of these kids off. Always tried to give them their fair share of playing time. Eventually reality sets in for these kids, and they’ll move on to something else. Hopefully they take away something positive.
Somewhere around age 10 the brain and body finally establish a relationship. The bunch-ball, herd mentality fades, simple tactical instructions begin to make sense and are actually executed (at least on occasion) and a level of competitiveness sets in. You can start to lay a foundation, but don’t expect every 6-year-old to know left from right, who won (much less the score) or necessarily even which direction he/she is going. Halftime oranges and post-game drinks are as much a priority as the result. If you start stressing wins and losses at a young age, you are setting yourself and the kids up for disappointment.
Even when the kids are older and winning becomes important to them, keep an even keel. After fourth grade, we lost three key players to a premier team. For four seasons through fifth and sixth grades, we won maybe six games. Tough to take for a team that only had lost about six times since kindergarten. But the kids kept coming to practice and kept giving it their best each Saturday. By the time they were in junior high, the improvement was noticeable and the wins returned.
Don’t use fitness as punishment, at least until that brain-body mesh happens. If you’re making a 7-year-old run laps or do push-ups because he/she can’t execute a simple technique or isn’t paying attention, you aren’t solving the problem. And pretty soon the kid is going to look on any kind of fitness training as pure drudgery. Having him/her sit on the sidelines for a few minutes is far more effective.
At least once a season have a crazy practice. Maybe it’s after a particularly bad loss, maybe at a point where the kids seem burned out or late in the season when everybody simply needs a change of pace. Let them play basketball or team handball. If you want to make it soccer-related, play soccer volleyball or soccer tennis. Late in the fall after the clocks change and you’re short on daylight, have a flashlight practice.
Don’t over-practice. Having the little kids practice more than once a week or for more than an hour is over-kill in my opinion. Kids have other things going on in their lives, whether it’s another sport, homework, Scouts, piano lessons or simply playing in the backyard. Except for the rare child who is highly focused and motivated, you’ll run the risk of burning out the majority. (And if you don’t burn out the kid, you may burn out the parent.) As the kids get older, you’ll begin to get a feel for when they are ready for more practice. Start by adding an optional second practice during the week. The kids who are serious will come, and you can build from there.
By and large, parents aren’t a problem. We’ve all heard the horror stories – some have been recounted in this column – and they should not be trivialized. The vast majority of parents, however, are supportive and understanding. If you manage expectations up front, treat their children fairly, stay positive and keep that even keel, problems with parents are unlikely. Unfortunately, I’ve seen more problem coaches than parents in my nine years on the sidelines of youth soccer.
So it’s off to high school for my older child this fall. I’ll look forward to watching him play on the freshman team, but it’ll be strange watching someone else coach him (undoubtedly good for him, though).
Of course, there’s still the matter of his 10-year-old brother. If I can retain these lessons and continue to learn, I’ll see if I can be a better coach. |
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